The always (if nothing else) entertaining folks at Vice have just published what is no doubt destined to become fodder for future urban legends. Behold: the Legend of the British Pub Piss Dungeon.
According to their unnamed sources a patron at a popular chain pub in London recently complained of seeing an eyeball staring back up at him from the urinal while he was taking care of business.
“Not just an eyeball, but, like, an eyebrow as well. And the eye
was looking around” the source said.
Incredulous no doubt, the manager went about his duty of investigating the claim nonetheless and headed down to check on the two adjoining rooms next to the men’s restroom. The first room (an anteroom if you will) was “pretty much flooded with urine” but at this point, let’s be honest, this could all be attributed to a leaky pipe. But that’s when things took a much more disturbing turn.
Things get stranger still when they get to the door to the second back room, which is a fire exit and should be unlocked—it isn’t. My friend gets his keys out to unlock the door, and as he begins to do so, a frantic scuffle begins behind the door. As he attempts to push it open, the handle is ripped out of his hand and a dude comes charging out of the room, soaked head to toe in piss. He pushes both my friend and the customer (who are too shocked to react) out of the way, screaming, “I didn’t do anything!” as he ran away.
In fact the entire plumbing fixture for the urinal had been removed and placed neatly to the side. Stuffed inside the resulting hole (just big enough for a head and shoulders to squeeze in) were paper towels, presumably so that one could lie down comfortably for the duration of the evening whilst getting pissed on. Oh, and apparently there was also a snorkel involved.
The alleged culprit was said to be your everyday normal looking middle aged man. A normal middle aged man with obviously a lot of time on his hands and a determination to be pissed on by the hordes of drunken Londoners frequenting this popular pub.
Could this be the next Trough Man? Only time will tell. But for now it’s simply too good to not report. Pictures below.